I get asked a lot if the reason I like birds is because I wish I could fly. I guess a lot of people say theyd pick the power of flight if they could choose a superpower, but to be honest, its not something thats ever appealed to me.
The point is, I dont love birds because I want to be a bird. They can do their thing and Ill do mine. However, there are always exceptions. One of them is Halloween.
For this weeks column, I decided to give some bird costume ideas to those of you who might still be looking for suggestions. I hope theyre useful.
Zombie Ivory-billed Woodpecker
The good news: Theyre not extinct! The bad news: Theyre back and lusting for human flesh!
Needs:
Black and white clothes
Red mohawk (or red hat, I suppose)
A big white papier mache bill, tipped with blood
Mutant Passenger Pigeon
You know how some people are talking about using Jurassic Park-style technology to bring back the Passenger Pigeon? What if they try and it all goes wrong!? What if they become crazy half-Pigeon mutants flying around trying to kill us!? Thats a great costume.
Needs:
Well, Passenger Pigeons had red breasts, blue-gray backs, and blue heads, so youll have to make some sort of suit. Or you could just wear a red shirt and blue pants and a blue hat?
Fake blood and maybe some of those crazy-eye contact lenses.
Human Turkey
Oh man, I just thought of an idea for a costume that's half human and half turkey. Wouldnt that be terrifying?
Needs:
All dark brown or black clothes
Youre going to need some gross hanging turkey-neck wattles. Maybe use clay? Or put some sand in some old socks and attach them to your chin somehow. Ew.
Barn Owl
Barn Owls are the scariest birds in my opinion. They look like ghosts, fly around silently, and scream like someone being murdered. Want to be a scary bird? Be a Barn Owl.
Needs:
Tan and white clothing
Maybe some scary white face makeup, or a homemade mask made out of a paper plate
There are a ton of beautiful birds out there. These costumes are about looking good, not looking scary.
Scarlet Tanager
Simple, but effective. Red all over with black wings. Could be a really nice costume if you wanted to wear a fancy dress and look like this .
Needs:
Red clothes
Black sleeves or gloves
Sexy attitude
Roseate Spoonbill
Lots of opportunities here. First, pink head to toe! Maybe you could even wear a tutu to imitate some feathers. Then, tape some spoons to your face! Itll be hilarious!
Needs:
Pink clothes
Spoons (Okay spoons taped to your face wont make you look snazzy, necessarily, but what else are you going to do for a spoonbill?)
Tape
Painted Bunting
I mean, its the most colorful bird weve got. It would be a blast to see someone go all out in homage.
Needs:
Red overalls
Green cape
Blue
Red sunglasses
Alternative option: dump a bunch of buckets of different-colored paints over your head and go like that
Just pick your favorite and copy it the best you can!
Maybe you forgot. Maybe you dont have the skills to make yourself a costume or the money to buy something. Most likely, youre just too lazy to put the effort in. No worries, weve got you covered.
Indigo Bunting
So easy.
Needs:
Blue denim shirt and blue jeans. Bonus: Carry a hockey stick and youre now a Canadian.
American Crow, Fish Crow, Common Raven
Needs:
All black clothes.
Optional: Wear a white t-shirt under a black sweater and you can be Chihuahuan Raven.
Red-headed Woodpecker
Needs:
White pants
Black shirt
Red hat
Bald Eagle
Needs:
Brown shirt
White pants
Bald cap (or nothing, if bald)
As an alternative to dressing up like an actual bird, it might be a little easier to dress as a figure from birdings history.
John James 91做厙
The king himself!
Needs:
Buckskin shirt
Giant white sideburns, if going as
Watercolors
Flowing .
Sir John Franklin
This was the British naval officer and man for whom the Franklins Gull is named. He died in 1847 when his expedition was lost somewhere in the Canadian Arctic, maybe near . This is a good, deep-cut birding costume because its also sort of scary.
Needs:
Old timey Naval clothes
Maybe some blue makeup to make it look like youre frozen? (Hey, its Halloween.)
Prop gull
Needs:
Normal clothes
Binoculars
Field Guides for every country in the world that you have to carry around all night
Turn-of-the-Century Lady in a Egret-plume Hat
The scariest monsters of all. The 91做厙 Society was founded in order to prevent the extinction of egrets and other birds at the hands of hunters supplying the fancy-hat trade.
Needs:
Fancy old dress
Fancy old hat, with a FAKE big , or . . . my goodness, is that an ?
Unquenchable thirst for the destruction of living creatures
Thats all Ive got. If this column helped you, or you otherwise dress like a bird or birder this Halloween, please send pictures to @TheBirdist and @91做厙Society. Happy Halloween!
